Labor day just passed which means that kickoff is literally right around the corner and the annual “This is the Year that the Cardinals will become an NFL Powerhouse” chatter is at a fever pitch. The present is so bright, Matt Leinart might revert to being cross-eyed!
On a tangent, am I the only girl who thinks that even when he is showered and cleaned up, he still looks kind of greasy and sweaty, and not in the sexy roll in the hay way but in the I used to be a smelly, greasy, sweaty, cross-eyed kid way? And besides, I don’t want to have anything to do with someone whose dalliances with one jailbird heiress might have forced him to scrub tilex on his unmentionables. It just doesn’t speak too highly of him.
Anyway, while the other experts cite the many obvs - new coach with a Super Bowl ring, two great receivers, Adrian Wilson who can jump over you while you stand…
…a possible future hall of fame running back, and the aforementioned formerly cross-eyed QB looking to make vast improvements - and have made the Cardinals a trendy pick to win the NFC West, I’ll go contrary popular opinion and say that they will finish dead last.
Something will go wrong. Matt Leinart may become cross-eyed again. Though Anquan Boldin used to play quarterback, his receiver skills may not fit in Coach (don’t call me the Whizinator) Whisenhunt’s new offense. Russ Grimm may not be able to change “the culture of leakiness” in the offensive line. Levi Brown may become Leonard Davis II, never playing up to his potential.
Besides, any team that wants to implement Mike Nolan’s signature hybrid 3-4/4-3 defense of the last two years is just asking for trouble. The 49ers were ranked in the bottom of NFL defenses running that crazy ass defense.
Now watch them go on to win the Super Bowl. Either way, you heard it here first.
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